“The lie is that depression and suicide are things that we can’t talk about.

It’s a lie that causes people to feel alone and live alone when it comes to their pain. The truth is that, as people, we all relate to pain. We all struggle from time to time, we all experience sadness, and we all encounter huge questions in this life. All of that is part of this human experience that you and i keep waking up to.

And with all of that in mind, welcome to National Suicide Prevention Week. This week, people all across America are pushing back at the lie. Thousands more will join them on Thursday for World Suicide Prevention Day. Together we will say that it’s important to talk about mental health and suicide. Together we will say that it’s okay to be honest and it’s okay to ask for help. Together we will say we’re not alone.”

– Jamie Tworkowski, To Write Love on Her Arms


This week is National Suicide Prevention Week 2015. I believe Jamie is right when he says “the lie is that depression and suicide are things we can’t talk about.” Things like depression, suicide, and mental illness are definitely things we CAN talk about and SHOULD talk about. In the spirit of this, I’d like to join in on pushing back at the lie, because no one should ever feel like they are alone. 

If you’ve been following along with my blog and in my life in general, then you probably already know my story dealing with suicide, depression, and self-harm. If you didn’t already know that, well, I come to you in the spirit of honesty and transparency to tell you this: I have clinical depression. (If this comes as surprise to you, you can scroll down to my first blog post to learn more.)

I share this not because I want to dampen your spirits, make you feel sorry for me, or anything like that. I share this because I want you to know you are not alone. I’ve struggled with so many dark days. I have felt so alone and so hopeless. I used to hurt myself to try to make myself feel better. I’ve thought about suicide many times in the past, and I’ve even attempted it a few times. Five years ago, when I first took those pills to make myself disappear, I had felt so hopeless. I didn’t see a light at the end of the tunnel. All I saw was darkness. I couldn’t imagine a future for myself. Now, five years later, I’m happy to say that I didn’t go through with it that first time and that all my attempts after never went through either. I am still here, and I am so happy I stayed. 

If you are reading this, please know that the brightest mornings come after the darkest days. Even when it feels like all hope is lost and there’s no where to go but away, please hold on. Don’t go away. As cliche as it sounds, keep holding on and stay strong. Though I’ve come so far in conquering my depression, I still struggle sometimes. The important thing, however, is that I keep fighting. I hope you keep on fighting too. It may not feel like it, but know that you are so important. You are so loved, so valued, so worthy. You are worthy of life. 

I share this with you today because I want to join the world in saying that it’s important to talk about mental health and suicide. It’s okay to be honest and it’s okay to ask for help. We are not alone. You are not alone. 

No one else can play your part. We are here for you, and we will see you tomorrow.

With love,

CJ Ochoco

The Girl, Uninhibited